


Hibiki

by sinn_vs



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Kinda, M/M, Oneshot, Suicidal Thoughts, eichirei, eiwata, past reichi (implied), vent fic, wataei
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:33:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24519244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinn_vs/pseuds/sinn_vs
Summary: Eichi contemplates whether life is worth the pain he's endured. He remembers there's a single light left in his darkness.
Relationships: Hibiki Wataru/Tenshouin Eichi, Sakuma Rei/Tenshouin Eichi
Kudos: 19





	Hibiki

Eichi Tenshouin, the emperor, the tyrant, no. The man. The man with emotions, with more feelings than people around to share them with. Eichi felt things, he felt everything. He felt guilt, for the wrong he’s done, for hurting Shu Itsuki, for creating the eccentrics only to tear them apart, for destroying the happiness of others for his own personal gain. He felt love. Love for Wataru Hibiki, his angel, his savior, the one who deserved everything life had to offer and more. Love for Rei Sakuma, the opposite of Wataru but who had still brought so much light into his life once upon a time, ironic as it was. He felt anger. Anger at himself for, well, everything. For not seeing how the very people he cared about were the ones he was hurting the most. Eichi was a man of few words, and even fewer expressions, but he felt everything.

And as he lay in his hospital bed, being kept alive but nothing but a machine, he wondered if it was all worth it. Was the peak he so desperately reached for worth the pain? Was it worth it? He began to think it wasn’t. That all he had built in his life had been pointless. Was it worth it to feel? He began to wish he didn’t have to feel anything at all. That if he could stop feeling altogether, things would be better. He wouldn’t feel a pang in his chest upon seeing Wataru’s smile aimed at someone else. At seeing Rei’s pained expression when their eyes met across a room of people. At seeing the thing he spent his life creating falling apart in front of his eyes, deteriorating like his very being.

Eichi’s head hung heavy upon his shoulders, the very need to keep breathing felt like a burden. The sky was dark, not even the moon was strong enough to pierce the clouds. The world around him was blurry. Or was he crying? He didn’t care to know. The act of living involved too much feeling. There were many days he wondered if it would be easier to not live at all. He could sleep forever, comforted by the darkness and he’d never have to feel again. On those days, Wataru would often visit him, as if he had the ability to sense Eichi’s internal war. Wataru wouldn’t come tonight. He shouldn’t. It was far too late. Eichi was alone. He believed he was fated to be like this forever, trapped in the company of nothing but himself.

“Eichi?” The man was too weak to raise his own head, assuming it to have been his own imagination. Or perhaps he had fallen asleep and this was another dream. The line between consciousness and unconsciousness was as blurry as his vision in times such as these.

“Eichi?” There it was again. A voice pounding against the doors of his conscience, begging to be acknowledged. A hand wrapped itself around Eichi’s. 

“Eichi, look at me, please.” Somewhere in his mind, Eichi knew the voice. But he couldn’t place it. His thoughts had wandered to corners they had never visited. Another hand came to rest underneath Eichi’s chin, lifting it. His eyes struggled to focus on the image being forced upon them, content on being blurry and half-lidded. Both hands now rested on Eichi’s face, wiping the stray tears he forgot had been falling. His sight was cleared long enough to register the being in front of him.

“Hibiki.” A smile rewarded his recognition. He loved that smile, he loved it more than anything else. If he could take the happiness it brought him and store it away, he would. Which is exactly why he never wanted to see it again. Happiness was weakness, it was something he didn’t deserve, and he was well aware of this fact. The pain he’d caused Wataru was undeniable, one time Eichi thought he heard him crying. Yet even still, he was here. He was here giving Eichi his smile, at a time where he should be sound asleep in the comfort of his own home. The very thought caused his eyes to well up once again. 

“Please don’t cry, my love.” 

\------------------ **_my love_ ** \--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Eichi had come full circle once again, taking back what he said. He wanted to be around Wataru forever. To always be basked in his warm glow. He was selfish. But everyone was. He had feelings after all. Regardless of how much he wished he didn’t, he would always have feelings as long as his heart was still beating.

“Hibiki.” He repeated, a weak smile cracking through his frozen face. The man in front of him wrapped his arms gently around Eichi. A simple gesture, but to someone who only knew darkness, it was as if the sun was embracing him, warming his heart and refusing to let him leave this world. The arms that laid on his side remained unresponsive, but Eichi buried his face in Wataru’s chest, a silent act of gratitude.

_ Thank you Hibiki, for everything. I do not deserve your kindness. _

**Author's Note:**

> This was a vent fic I wrote, but liked enough to post. Hope you enjoyed regardless, comments and kudos always appreciated


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